PUNCHING AND SWEARING IN THE GYMNASIUM

Miraculously, it would never give trouble again. I wonder if I could experiment with this technique, but this time I would implement it on the few conveniently forgetful members training at the Tuks Gym that are either accidentally or purposefully absent minded. Perhaps a kick to the midsection coupled with some @#%$# and some &*^%@#+ and maybe a bit of @#%&@* would go a long way to assist the few predictably, troublesome members to mend their frustrating ways. I highly doubt this will happen but it makes for a pleasant thought none the less. I would however rather like to ask the gym members to help out where they can and obey the rules of the gym. As a member myself I constantly try to adhere to the few rules they have, and find it quite simple to do so ensuring I experience a pleasant and enjoyable workout, of which those are certainly my favourite.

Lets go through some of the things that as a member I find quite annoying from my fellow members.

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• Forgetting their student / gym card - Not only do the poor gym employees have to stop the work that they are already behind on so they can open your account to check if you are a valid member, but you also slouch over the entrance while you wait for them to do so and block the way for the members who actually remembered that the gym has an access control system that requires a card to enter. Here at University (Big people school) you should know that that if you require access to certain areas, you need to bring a card. Try this if you don’t agree with me – The next time you go to an ATM to draw money, don’t take your card with and see how much money it spits out for you. What’s that? Pockets still empty? What a surprise!?
• Not packing away weights – As a gym member, I understand that when you use weights that are already lying on the floor it doesn’t make sense to pack them away afterwards, but c’mon guys, just because the person before you didn’t have any manners and doesn’t understand the gym’s membership rules (Gym Commandments) doesn’t mean you have to follow in their footsteps. Set an example and follow the gym commandments. Doing so will ensure the weights you need will be exactly where you expect them to be resulting in less searching and more training. Another fascinating point that some fail to understand is that by replacing the weights, you inadvertently burn a few extra calories! Wow! That ‘cut’ look you want so bad can now be achieved by simply doing what you’re supposed to i.e. replacing the weights you have used! Who would have guessed!?
• Packing weights in the wrong place – Now this one is a kicker! The weights are either colour or number coded! Quite simple right? If the dumbbell has a green strip on it, it should be placed on the rack with the same green strip; or if the weight plate you used has a 5kg numeral on it, it goes on the corresponding tree limb (a contraption where the weight plates go) with the same 5kg numeral on it. Amazingly though, some members fail to comply and possibly don’t understand this apparently simple system. So in the process of my own workout, I find weights and dumbbells all over the place? Totally baffling, must be a conspiracy!?
• Bringing a gym towel – Now this one I am particularly passionate about. Why you may ask, well simply put, a physiological result of increased and continuous movement is sweating! The body produces this sweat in order to assist itself to cool down. A wonderful added benefit by our creator, but unfortunately due to sweat containing various bodily by-products, it does tend to have a rather pungent smell and most consider it to be of an unhygienic nature. Therefore, when a gymer manages to push him or herself (let’s not discriminate) to the limit, they may find that they have perspired quite a great deal. This SWEAT finds its way onto the machine or bench. Now, the gymer doesn’t have a towel to wipe it down with, so what do you think most of the gymers do? They leave it, yup so the next unfortunate gymer who has to use the machine or bench has to use his clean towel, to wipe away the sweat puddle! Ugghh! Unfortunately that next gymer tends to be me! Needless to say, I have had to incinerate many a towel!
• Wearing the correct footwear – Why is this important I hear you ask? Well, the main reason I would think, is that wearing flip flops to the gym results in your well manicured toes protruding from your flip flops. And with their being large amounts of heavy, metallic and hard things lying all about (generally because the weights have not been returned) the possibility of one stumping a toe or tripping on weights left on the floor are relatively good. This could very well result in a painful injury to the above mentioned toe. Although wearing the correct shoes will do nothing to stop you from tripping over left over weights, you may find it will greatly reduce your chances of messing up your pedicure.

So as a fellow member using the same gym you do, I implore you to please consider your fellow gymers, and abide by the rules i.e. Gym Commandments. They are there after all to make your life so much easier, and will also ensure you avoid being warned by the Tuks Gym staff, when you do not abide by the rules, of which I must admit I have been guilty, but not anymore. Now I find my good relationship with the gym employees tends to ensure they see me in a good light come the last Monday of every month. Aaah, good things do come to those who do good! Try it, you may find I know what I’m talking about.