Workout at the gym

The experience of a pessimist.

It is customary at work that every Christmas season we do what we’ve termed “Secrete Santa”, where each colleague gets a gift for another colleague anonymously. For this year I received a voucher for one week of gym training with a Personal Trainer at the health club in the neighbourhood. I convinced myself that I was still in great shape from when I was on the varsity chess team, and decided that it was a great idea to go ahead and try it. I called in and booked the sessions at the reception. I was to train with a trainer by the name Shanigua. I was ready for any challenge, at least I thought, and kept a high level of enthusiasm. I researched on fitness health and nutrition to prepared myself and even got myself an "exercise diary" thing that I would use to chart my progress for the week. So this is how it went.

Day 1

6:00 am I was at the gym. I had never woken up earlier than 6am since high school camp. But with the enthusiasm, nothing felt foreign, I was ready to take on the world. I arrived at the health club and found Shani (As I decided to call her after having seen her). The name Shanigua had not done justice to what I saw waiting for me. It was a woman, no I’m wrong, a goddess with long blond hair and a stunning friendly smile. She took me around the gym and showed me different sections of the gym with all its machines. She made me stand in front of some machine where I had to grip silver handles and she recorded my pulse.

We then kicked off with five minutes on the treadmill after which she took my pulse again. She looked at me strangely with alarm and indicated that it was a little high for a 5 minute jog, but I think just standing next to her in that outfit of hers added a few more heart beats. I couldn’t maintain focus. It was as if my focal vision was being magnetically pulled away from her face to anywhere lower than her shoulders.

Shani cheered me on as I did my sit ups, and I was a little surprised that she stayed next to me even though I let out a little air almost for every rep. My gut cramped on stopping and I thought to myself, “This is going to be great”.

Day 2

Took a lot of self talk and psyching up to get me out the door, but I made it. At least I could look forward to just seeing her. Shani had me lie face up on a bench and push this heavy iron bar up and down. She then added plates on either side, for heaven's sake, the bar was heavy on its own!! Legs were a little wobbly on the treadmill, but I stayed on for 10 minutes this time. Her smile made it all worthwhile. Chest felt a little puffy, and that just brought a little more motivation. I was in pain though.

Day 3

After resting for one day, It was a struggle to get out of bed, and this time not only was I sleepy but my body felt like I had a waxing session the whole night. The short walk to the bathroom was a “mission”. I couldn’t lift my arms, bend over or even lift my feet to get on a chair to reach for my toiletries. Shower time was a little different this time. I just stood under the spray and let the warm water run down my aching body. After 10 minutes I felt better, and I was on my way for another session. Driving was okay but getting in and out of the car was not easy. I let out a little scream and the parking attendant looked at me with suspicion. Shani was a little impatient with me that day and said my screaming was bothering the other club members. The treadmill was a little harder that day and couldn’t keep up with belt, so I did the stair monster. Why would anyone invent a machine to simulate an activity replaced by the invention of elevators and escalators? That day, I promise, I didn’t take notice of her beautiful body or enjoy the sweetness of her voice. I couldn’t imagine anything worse.

Day 4

15 minutes late and Shani was walking up and down by the reception seemingly concocting how to punish me for warm up and then giving me a torture session. I couldn’t help being late, it had taken a lot of pain and screaming just to put on my vest. She wanted me to lift dumbbells. “Not a chance lady, I said to myself”. The word "dumb" must be in there for a reason. So I stormed into the gents change rooms until I was eventually escorted out, back to the torture ‘iron jungle’ by a man who looked like he was made of iron himself. I begged Shani to let me spend the rest of the session at the stretching area, she agreed. “That’s what I’m taking about, I love this”. Though the stretches were painful, the distraction from the other female members countered the pain.

Day 5

If there was any part of my body not in extreme pain it was an internal organ. She thought it would be a good idea to work on my triceps. Tri…. what? Don’t TRY me now..!! I actually never knew there were muscles behind my arm. I always had the impression that it was all fat. I had always seen what most ladies call the “bye byes”, and you telling me that there are 3 muscles there. Well, we did the “press downs” and “skull crashers” both of which I thought had intimidating names.

Day 6

I called in to cancel and lied that I couldn’t make it because I had to be at work due to an “emergency”. I had made an emergency appointment with the masseuse one block away from my flat. I then spent the rest on the day on the couch watching the discovery channel.

Day 7

Well, it was just one day left anyway so what was the point. I had already missed day six. I felt like I was wasting her time. I had even pulled the cable from my phone.

I sat on the bed; thoughts crowded my mind battling each other.

People actually pay to do this kind of thing? And they still have to pay again through their aching muscles. But wait a second, I thought. NO PAIN NO GAIN…. The Old Saying……!!!!

Health and fitness is a lifestyle that we make a decision to live out, not a periodic excursion of pain and suffering that we do to lose a spare tyre around the mid rift, or drop a few dress sizes. In essence, we really need to want to do it, rather than feel we have to, and yes it is painful, and you may hate yourself for ever choosing this life of seemingly unnecessary discomfort, but like anything in life, when you put in the work, it is inevitable that the results will follow. Make no mistake though, it will take discipline and devotion to the cause and service providers like Personal Trainers, as intimidating as they may be at times, they are specially trained to help you get the results that you have committed to.

The benefits of living a healthy and energetic life far outweigh the early mornings and stiff muscles. A famous musician was once asked about her extreme and explicit performances on stage and her response went like this. “Yes, the first time I do it, they’ll most likely be shocked by it; the second time, they’ll hate it; the third time they’ll become numb to it; the fourth time they’ll like it; and the fifth time I do it, they’ll start experimenting with it.” So it is with exercise, there will come a point where even though the pain is there, because you’ve been training for a while, you’ve become numb to the pain. The eventual is that you may even start to experiment with advanced gym exercises.

So don’t lose heart, and don’t listen to your body screaming at you not to do it, grab the bull by the….horns and create the habit (they say it takes 21 days to form a habit) of a healthy life. Chose exercise and add hours to your day, and years to your life.